What’s the Point of Getting Married Anymore?
Let’s just ask it.
No whispering.
No fake deep sigh.
What is the actual point of getting married anymore?
Because the way these marriages are set up…
It is giving stress with benefits.
The Fairytale Lied to Us
We were promised forever.
White dresses.
Matching last names.
A man who magically becomes emotionally intelligent the moment the ring hits his finger.
Plot twist.
That ring did not activate a thing.
Marriage does not mean:
• You will be chosen daily
• You will be protected emotionally
• You will suddenly feel seen
Some women are married and still crying in the bathroom.
Some women are married and feel like single moms… with a roommate.
So again.
What are we doing here?
Women Are Already Carrying Enough
Let’s be clear.
Women are not afraid of committing to marriage.
We are afraid of committing to more work.
We already:
• Pay bills
• Raise kids
• Hold households together with prayer and a planner
• Go to therapy
• Heal childhood wounds
• Read the books
If I still have to do everything AND stroke your ego?
Sir.
Absolutely not.
Marriage Is Competing With Peace
And marriage is losing.
Because peace is calm.
Peace sleeps through the night.
Peace does not raise my blood pressure.
Peace does not need constant reassurance.
Marriage has to beat:
• My peace
• My freedom
• My soft life
• My boundaries
• My nervous system being regulated
If marriage disrupts all of that?
It is a no for me, boo.
Marriage Is Optional. Alignment Is Not.
This is not anti-marriage.
This is anti-struggle-union.
Marriage only makes sense if it is:
• A partnership
• A safe space
• A team effort
• Two adults who actually like each other
If I am still lonely, overwhelmed, and unheard?
I could have stayed single and saved on groceries.
Choosing Yourself Is the Upgrade
Not being married is not a failure.
Getting divorced is not a character flaw.
Staying single is not a cry for help.
It is discernment.
It is growth.
It is knowing the difference between love and liability.
So what is the point of getting married anymore?
Only if it adds value.
Only if it brings peace.
Only if it feels like ease, not endurance.
Only if it feels God sent.
Anything else?
We are not missing out.
We are dodging bullets.
And that, honey, is wisdom with a glossed lip and a raised brow. 💋
P.S. If this post hit a little close to home, my book, A Rose Is Still a Rose: The Journey to Rediscovering You (After Relationship Trauma), is for the woman who’s been bent, bruised, and tried—but never broken. If relationship trauma made you forget who you were, this book walks you back home to yourself, reminding you that your worth never wilted.
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